Houry

Hi Houry

Do not forget the heading, "coping with the heat wave". No they have cloth to wear but the weather was so hot during the summer that they were in their undies to stay cool. A friend of mine called Carl Robichaud from the states, took the picture.
The orphanage has about 70 kids, 3-7 year olds, some were found at the doorstep, some were brought in by their single mothers who could not take care of them anymore and some are orphans on all sides, no father, no mother and no relatives.
By the way this orphanage is part of my tours for the groups that I show around. I had a group from Canada where they collected $650.00 between themselves as a donation. Another group from France adopted 3 kids and last month they sent boxes of toys and dolls for all the kids, another group sent brand new sweaters for the teachers and the people who take care of them. 3 weeks ago “Seda” was there and she gave $10 to each teacher. “Garine” from Toronto worked with the kids during the summer. HOM Armenia feeds them breakfast lunch and dinner every Saturday (They also do the same for the other
orphanages one day a week). So we do our best to take care of them and to keep them happy, also the teachers who have not collected pay for the last 6 months yet they still come to work and you should see how they treat the kids, like their own.
Last month Zabelle and me were there and many of them did not have decent shoes for the summer I can imagine what it's going to be like during winter. If you are interested in helping them I can buy some shoes for them and you can pay me when I get there. Tell me how much you want to donate and I'll see what I can do.
Every time we go there we want to bring back a few of them home with us, they are so cute specially the little girls. So we took 4 of them to the amusement park one time, it's close by the place and they had lots of fun not because of the rides or the popcorn but being with us like a family, which is what they miss the most. Material things, they do not even know that it exists but the parenting and the emotional bond towards having a father and mother can not be replaced with anything but actual contact with them. That is why we take everyone who comes to Armenia for a visit or we will take the kids out whenever we have time in the future.
Zabelle is already in TO and I'll be there if things work out here by the end of the month to spend Christmas and New Year with our families and friends in Canada.
So see you soon.

Nigol

November 6, 2000
Hi Nigol,

Thanks for your letter today.  I am relieved in a big big way!  Keep up the great work.  It's a great idea to take visitors there, that way it benefits everyone, teachers, kids and even the visitors who will see things as they really are.
It's especially great that you take the kids out and give them a sense offamily.
I'll donate $200.00 Canadian, it's up to you to do whatever you want with it...buy them shoes, pay the teachers, take them to the park...
That's all for today, looking forward to seeing you in Toronto.

Houry

I was reading some old e-mails and I read the one you sent on Sept. 6th.
There were too many thank you's and we did nothing actually .... no thank YOU for letting us be kind to you ...No thank YOU
for letting us be hospitable to you, typical Canadian eh?
On a more serious note ... yesterday a tourist was asking me if I was happy and I would stay here... You know how it feels to have a job that you like ... to make a living through something you enjoy ... to sell something you believe in and not do all that just to make money or because you have no choice ... that's exactly how I feel.
Every time I show a tourist ... any church or castle ... the lakes or the mountains ... the sun the weather ... I point at a cute kid standing in a corner an old woman full of wrinkles and character .... take them to a cafe or a  restaurant ... a theater or a concert ... a ballet or an opera ... I point to the professionalism and the creativity of our artists ... solve a problem they might encounter or give them an advise ... see them happy or cry at the airport when they leave ... When a tourist says that he was scared he would hate the place, then after a few weeks with me showing him around and letting him see Armenia through my eyes, he tells me see you next year... I feel satisfied, fulfilled, accomplished .... I feel so lucky to be doing all these and proud, not of what I'm doing but proud of what I'm showing them ... proud of Armenia the land, by the way in the beginning I kind of despised the people and saw many faults in them, I don't anymore, can you imagine that I even like the cop that stops me ... even though I fight with them yet I still love them ... I argue with the  seller who cheats me yet I forgive in the end.
Yup that's how I feel, do you have a problem with that.
We are coming to Canada in a month or so, every time I think about it I have the shivers but then I think of my friends and family that I have there and calm down.
See you soon.

Nigol
PS and Zabelle feels exactly the same way I feel.

September 6, 2000
Shad Sireli Nigol & Zabel,

First of all let me apologize for not writing earlier.  Since we've returned things have been very hectic, first of all relatives and friends coming and going, and then of course trying to get into the daily rhythm of our mundane lives.

I wanted to thank you both for your kindness and hospitality, we all greatly appreciated it. The children are great, they started school today, about which they were very nervous.  It seems to have gone well, God help us for the rest of the year.

It's been very strange since we got back.  For the first week I would wake up wondering which city I was in.  My daughter  still can't stop talking about her experiences and feelings, she's in love with the place .... it seems I've trained her well.  Today My son had some Hayots Badmoutiun to read, and it was all about the geography of Armenia.  He didn't need to read it because he already knew the answers.  That was a very good feeling, made the whole trip worth it.

I hope you both are doing well.  Nothing of interest to report from here actually, the same blah blahs.  How is the weather?  It's been very odd here, one day hot and the next day very cold.

Anyway, take care and I hope to hear from you soon.  Once again thank you.

love
maria

Hey guys, hope you're doing well.  I'm okay.  Spent the last few days getting my stuff together, developing pictures, transferring Ashod's films, and all that stuff.  My parents say hello and thanks a million for taking care of me.  Guys I miss you a lot, I miss life there, it's funny because I sit in my house, yet I feel so far away from home.  I can't get used to the idea that I live here and I should start looking for a job.  Anyhow, thank you again guys, let me know if you need anything from here, anything at all and I'll arrange something.  Please say hello to everyone, Radig, Giro, Anto, Dzovig, everyone you see, and take good care, I'm doing my best to come back soon!

Miss you,
garine

Regards,
Wee Cheng

I read your reply to 'her highness's' letter to spiurq and for the thousandth time in the last three years of my life abroad I felt irresistibly angry about people (spiurqahais or hayastantsis (this is what spiurqahais call us)) telling what
Armenians of Armenia or Armenians of Spiurk need to do to help the recovery of our truly wonderful homeland. Isn't it time to simply call ourselves just HAY, instead of HAIASTANTSI, AMERIKAHAY, HUNAHAI, PARSKAHAI,
LIBANANAHAI, FRANSAHAY, TAJKAHAY? and act together for the well being of a single and small piece of land we must be happy we have.

I was born in Yerevan, I grew up in Yerevan, I went to Law School in Yerevan and learned dancing, singing and crafts in Yerevan. So, I feel I earned the right to love Yerevan, the one I Knew, I Know and the one it will turn to be. I left for the US on the day of presidential elections, disappointed, frustrated, my eyes full of tears. I strongly believed in building new life -- democratic, respect for a rule of law state. It was painful for me to observe how a presidential candidate started his campaign (or his government-mafiosi type supporters have started) violating the Constitution of RA and went ahead till the final elections, continuing to violate other laws as well.  For me, non of them deserved to be a leader of my country, non of them really cared about anything else but more avtoritetni power, more money creating corruption tools.
And a leadership like that didn't deserve the pleasure to rule a citizen like me, because they couldn't possibly be my representatives in the process of building of a new society.

Everywhere spiurqahays kept blaming haiastantsis and haiastantsis kept blaming spiurqahays for not being able to change things in Hayastan. From my opinion, if we want to achieve something, the first thing we have to do is getting unified, forgetting the cultural differences of the countries where we live. It's a hard thing to do, but it's worth of a try.
As long as hayastantsis think that spiurqahais are only after money, and spiurqahais believe that haiastantsis are after robbing them and corruption, nothing can be done in the filed of electing the right leader, the right candidate.

My comments sound too critical but I'm sure that many of my friends, who chose to leave for Western countries rather than live under the rule of such a disgraceful power, would share them. We're a large group of young professionals and students. We get scholarships at the best Western universities and top jobs in successful Western companies. Non of us works for Armenia, though. For most of our Armenian families we're the only source of their survival.  We're ready to move back and help to rebuild, but it doesn't seem anybody is missing us back there, because our appearance would mean that a lot of things would have to be changed, a lot of corrupt officials'd've to pay for the troubles they'd caused to their own people.

Armenians are not rebellious to rise against the power but they'll always find another way to live a life, an average human being longs for. So, they choose they better leave. And blaming us for not staying in Armenia is very wrong because non of spiurqahays or those sitting in the power has ever lived and suffered the way we have. We're the ones who lived the dark and cold days without proper food, electricity, gas and water. We're the ones who've been and still are being corrupted by the government officials. We're the ones whose sons are serving in the army in extremely harsh conditions. Our rights are being neglected at every step of our social lives. Nobody seems to be goining to pay for it, so gathering all the dignity and pride that remains in us, we're leaving for somewhere else, expecting at least some psychological recovery.

To have us back, a lot of institutions need to be purified of corrupters. And definitely, even if we were still in Hayastan, we wouldn't be able to do it. Who's gonna do it then? Have no idea. The whole power system is a favour-for-favour circle, a chain, a group of officials, who drive the Benzes and have on their tables whatever they want, because they are avtoritets. Some of their children attend the Law School and openly speak about the 'heroic bribery and corruption' actions of their prosecutor, judge, policemen etc. parents. They earn their degrees without really having learnt anything at school. It's again their parents who've been bribing the professors to give a proper grade to their kids.

We definitely need a leading team, a very strong and honest one. This is where all the HAYS need to invest their time and money. A new team who would risk everything for cleaning 'the ship' inside out before leading it to any direction. A huge potential of educated young Armenians is wasting itself in foreign countries while the country sinks deeper and deeper into a dead end. Invest in us, bring us back, demand from us and be decisive, dear HAYS!!!!!

Sincerely
Anna.

August 19, 2000
To: Anna ,

You are wrong, we do miss you and your kind here.

We really know the feelings you are having and the troubles you go through, to be an Armenian in the U.S or in a foreign country is a struggle, it's an uphill climb.
Only Armenians like us can say, "let's forget the difference between a Spurkahai and a Hayasdantsi" because we are both at the moment. Only people like us can rebuild this country into what it's supposed to be because we feelbetrayed by our leaders both in and out of Armenia. We know the difference between right and wrong.

I was born a Libananahay then became Parskahay in 1975, later, Canadahay, Shvetahay (Sweden)1991/92, Gharabaghtsi in 93/94 then went back to Canada and was called Hayasdantsi, I'm back in Yerevan and they callme a spurkahay.
As you can see I've been called everything but Hay. Which is what I feel like.

I love this city and the country, do not mistake me for a patriot, let me tell you a story why.
Before I left Canada for permanent residence to Armenia, one of our "Spurkahay leaders"  was congratulating us in public, for our patriotism and self sacrifice. I turned around and told him how he was completely mistaken, "for I am a coward, running away from responsibility. I'm giving up the fight to stay Armenian in the Diaspora. I'm tired of being part of a minority all my life. I'm sick of telling kids to speak, read  and be Armenian. I am a weakling, but the heroes are the ones who stay behind and struggle, build churches, schools and community centers (agoump). You are the patriots, you who will fight to stay Armenian till your last breath. You are the frontline".

You were born here and learned to sing, dance and do crafts. That's what I envy most, I wish I could do the same but I had no time because I was always on the move. Had no time to enjoy Yerevan during my youth.

A French philosopher once said " Ideals are like the stars, when you are young you try to reach them. As you get old, you stop trying but you chart your life according to them". That is the stage I'm in now.

I live in Armenia and the government does not rule me, they bother me sometimes but never rule me. The right leaders of this country have to come from within your group, the young idealists, the educated and not the previous "seghanig" businessmen.
Not the Benz gang.
You have to educate the naive, commoners of this country, if each one of you can convert 10, eventually things can change.
Even if they don't, you can be proud to say that you have tried.
No one blames you for leaving Armenia, I stopped doing that when I lived here during the dark ages of 1993. When electricity was being stolen, when people were freezing. What the Turks did to us in 1915 out of patriotism ( drove off the Armenians from their lands), the leadership of this country was doing the same to it's own people for selfish reasons. I have more respect for Talaat then for Levon and his gang. What I say to you or what you say to me should stay between us Armenians, I believe we should not let foreigners know how corrupt is our leadership for it will make our country and our people more vulnerable.

I still have a flicker of hope that you and your kind will come back one day.

See you soon
Nigol

March 2000
The Stray Dogs of Yerevan

They are everywhere during the day, lying under the sun on the sidewalks
Some with a hint of being pure bred but most are unknown species
When you look into their sad eyes they bow their heads and walk away
With a hint of pride left, where in their memories it used to be abundant
They are around the garbage bins looking for something valuable
On the public steps waiting for by-passers to throw their leftover food
A neglected hole in a building covered with cardboard and tin, is their home
With rats and pests flickering everywhere, suffocating smell rules the air
They have chosen a feeling, called indifference, to sustain the daylight
With a bit of coolness they look away when a 600 Benz passes by
For they have it all, while the dogs do not even have a word called hope
They have the huge and ugly villas with walls around, satellite antennas
The Benzs rule daylight, they spit and smash the smoke buts on sidewalks
At nights when everyone sleeps the stray dogs of Yerevan start to complain
They bark to deaf ears at tight shot windows or to ears who can not hear
That’s when Benzs send their guns out to silence the loudest ones

I hope no one will be offended by what I’m about to say for it hurts me too
I was not talking about real dogs but about a portion of our population
The old pensioners who have given away their children to an ideology
The orphaned and neglected child, the woman abandoned and forgotten
I could not take their pictures or talk about them to the world outside
They have to keep the bit of pride left and the flicker of hope
I can not tell the real story of horror and despair that this people live
For I am also a part or a fringe of the Benz gang.

Nigol & Zabelle

May 9, 2000
Hi Juliet

I guess you misunderstood me, I am sorry, I am not pessimistic and I have the right to criticize my own people and my own country because I have chosen to live here and you did not.
I will stay here. I can take criticism from you because you are apparently of Armenian origin and I am proud that there are people like who defend the reputation of Armenia.
If you have heard about Baroness Cox's letter the very pessimistic and disturbing letter which she sent to the Diaspora Armenians a few months ago, then you should have gotten mad because she has no right to criticize Armenians or Armenia for that matter, just because she sends some money and help Artsakh while the Artsakhti's thousands of them fight for their land and die for it while she "her highness" wants to get some credit, I did answer her then in the armeniandigest site, if you haven't read it then here is a copy.

I know lately you all have been upset with Baroness Cox's letter  This is my opinion.  We all know the situation but no one is willing to do anything about it . The problem is the Armenians in Armenia not the ones in Diaspora, they can do nothing here.
The local politicians have to wake up and stop the corruption within themselves which is impossible when you have no leader with enough guts.
What Cox is saying is an exaggeration and very alarming, too bad it is directed towards the Diaspora which makes it seem a bit hopeless for you people out there because you know you can do absolutely nothing to stop it.
The problem is here and the solution has to come from here. We do not know where is she coming from by saying do not  put all your energy on the recognition of the genocide, what else can the "spurk" do, come to Armenia with shotguns  to protect it or send some more money to fuel the corruption.
The solution is with the Armenians in Armenia, we need them to wake up and solve their problems instead of running  from it to Los Angeles, they have to ask for a new leadership they have to vote and vote for the right person not for the one who pays them $10.

Spring is here in Armenia people have shed their coats and jackets you can see more skin nowadays. The "cafe's"  are open and a new one is opening in every street corner, that means we are still hopeful.  They are washing their cars, we did ours today after 4 months of mud and slime, the cost US$3.00.

When we discuss the people of Armenia we tend to forget the land, a land so beautiful, a land so dear to our hearts that has been ours for the last  3 milleniums ( which is something Canadians or Americans can never say) sometimes free sometimes not but always Armenians and our forefathers were living on it.  So, if everyone leaves, we are staying, and you all are welcome to stay with us or visit us once in a while.

On a final note, We were at a friends house today who used to be part of the Armenian freedom fighters of the seventies and in walked another one from the other side of the spectrum, they used to be on the opposite sides fighting for the same cause.
You should have seen them laughing and having fun together, you forget for a moment that one is in a wheelchair and the other can't see. They were so happy and hopeful and kept saying everything will be all right very soon. " shoudov ammen pan lav bidi ulla ", we trust them more than  Baroness Cox, so we'll be staying with them, and  not panic , you shouldn't too.
From Nigol & Zabelle